WOMJIA Children’s Shiny Nylon Soft School Backpack

We were both drawn to this because it’s shiny and we are not that far removed from crows. I also like that it has two mesh pockets on either side, perfect for his water bottle, and that the straps are cushioned. Something I’ve quickly realized is that if a backpack is uncomfortable, it’s not that your kid suffers. It’s that you do because you’ll end up carrying it. That said, with a backpack as dope-looking as this, that’d be mighty fine by me. My Son’s Take: “This backpack is nice because it’s shiny. It looks like it would feel nice on my back and also, if my water bottle opened I wouldn’t get wet.” NOTE: The backpack’s interior is not waterproof. Buy Now $26

Runningtiger Unique Unicorn Print Children’s Backpack

Naturally, I was stoked that my son would be into unicorns and rainbows. As a father to two boys, I frequently worry that I’ve somehow imprinted upon them, despite my best efforts, certain gendered aesthetics. So when my kid picked this one, I lit up with enthusiasm. Also, it’s got padded shoulder straps which mitigates the chances of my carrying the backpack. My Son’s Take: “At first I really liked it because it looked like that pattern that soldiers wear. But it’s actually unicorns.” Buy Now $25

PUMA Little Cyclone Backpack

Me, I’m a Jacksonville Jaguars and Air Jordan 8 fan so this bag had me at black and teal Besides that, it doesn’t quite break out of the pack but it has the side-pockets that I like and roomy dimensions of 15.5: high and 11″ wide, adequate to fit the infuriatingly heavy coursework for a first grader but not turtle-shell big. My Son’s Take: “I like that this is black and the cheetah on it. I think I could fit all my Pokémon cards in it.” Buy Now $21

PUMA Camouflage Boy’s Backpack

I actually think this one is hideous. But it has the same dimensions and ample pockets — 5 slip and 4 exterior — and size as every other PUMA boy’s backpacks (see above) so, look, if my kid wants it, that’s fine by me. My Son’s Take: “Oh, I like this one a lot, like A LOT. It has a cheetah on it and that pattern on it that I like.”

YISIBO 3D Cartoon Kids Backpack

At this point my 4-year-old son wanders over and wants to get in on the shopping. He immediately selects this one which is….awesome. I like that it’s lightweight (only 250g!) and made of Neoprene. I love the see-through pocket — the astronaut’s helmet — where you can stash things you want other people to see. Though I don’t use them myself, I appreciate the leash and the sheer number of straps available to secure the thing onto your kid. My Four-Year-Old Son’s Take: “I like this one because it’s electric.” NOTE: This backpack is not electric. Buy Now $20

Premium Mermaid Sequin Backpack

The only thing I hate about this backpack is the name “Premium Mermaid Sequin Backpack | Children’s School Backpack for Girls.” What about this beautiful sequined object makes it a) mermaidenly or b) for girls? To quote Zoolander, “MerMAN!” Everything else about is dope. My Son’s Take: “This backpack is really cool. It is sparkly, not shiny, but that’s okay. At least it’s not purple.” Buy Now $20

MKP Collection Casual Backpack

I’m of two minds sending my child to school with a backpack that looks like a cross between bondage wear and Louboutins. This is a very cool bag but it might be a lot for a seven-year-old. Long and narrow, the straps are not that comfortable-seeming but I do like that there are two top zippers and a bunch of interior pockets. My Son’s Take: “I love this one because it’s really really fancy. You can tell because there are jewels on it. I bet it’s like infinity dollars.” Buy Now $40